And Isaac brought her
into his mother Sarah's tent, and took Rebekah, and she became his wife; and he
loved her: and Isaac was comforted after his mother's death. Gen 24:67.
Comforting means to soothe, calm, console and reassure.
Comforting is not necessary without an occurrence that depresses and saddens. Ephesians
5: 16 says, “redeeming the time, because
the days are evil”. John 16; 33 also collaborates this, “These things I have spoken unto you, that
in me ye have peace. In the world, ye shall have tribulation: but be of good
cheer; I have overcome the world.” I believe it is a constant phenomenon to
experience calamities in life; so, comforting another it is a way of bringing
that person to be of good cheer!
With the foregoing, it is certain that the need for comforting
will arise. Our target today is comforting one another in a marriage or in a
relationship with brethren. If care is not taken, we could comfort wrongly as
well. There have been stories of young men who want to comfort a lady and
eventually impregnate such people. Comforting in a marriage is a cardinal thing
that must not be joked with because for every family, there would be a trying
period even if there is none at the moment, it is a reality.
When the trying times come, one should be careful about how
such is handled. There have been cases of depression and death through suicide
as a result of wrong handling of occurrences. Many people talk carelessly when
the situation is trying. Remember our friend, Job whose wife told him to deny
God because his labour of love seems wasted. Job 2:9, “then said his wife unto him, dost thou still retain thine integrity?
Curse God, and die.
Trying times in our days could be grieving over the loss of
a child, loss of job, loss of shop to fire, loss of many other valuables, days
like this when terrorism is raving the nation, Nigeria. People are broken on
many sides. People are deserted and they need encouragement. Leaders aggravate the
situation most times, instead of pacifying people. So, the best person that can
help out is one’s spouse at such trying times. It is very important to have the
person that will comfort one.
This is exemplified in the life of Isaac. He grieved over
the loss of his mother until his wife came into his life. People are being told
during the wedding that your wife becomes your mother, wife, sister, aunt,
niece and child likewise the man becomes the father, husband, brother, uncle, nephew
and child. This implies that the person has become the center of your life. An
old man once said that your spouse is the only person that stays with you for
the rest of life. You are separated from your parents at marriage, by the time
your siblings get married, you are further separated from them and when your
children grow up, they would also leave you. Your spouse is your permanent
associate. I believe that is why the Bible used the “rib” as the point from
which the woman is made from, except in rare cases, the rib is not removed from
the body.
Isaac got the replacement of his mother from his wife, he
saw his mother figure in his wife, his confidant and that was where the comfort
emerged from. Many men refrain from telling their wives everything, many men do
not take the advice of their wives, many men run to their fathers for counsel,
many men run to contemporaries for instructions and many men depend on tradition
to run their homes. If Christ is involved in the marriage, it would not be
difficult give in one’s totality to his wife.
The atmosphere where comforting can find expression is where
love reigns. The man must love his wife and the wife must submit to her
husband. Someone once explained that submission can be likened to surrendering all
while love can be likened to giving all. You can only get comforted when the
atmosphere is not charged with hatred.
Jesus did everything to ensure that we are comforted before
his departure and the final comfort that he gave us is the Holy Spirit. John
14:26 says, “but the Comforter, which is
the Holy Ghost, whom the Father will send in my name, he shall teach you all
things, and bring all things to your remembrance, whatsoever I have said unto
you” but there is someone who has the role of being your earthly comfort
and that is your spouse. Regardless of the challenge at hand, your spouse
should first bear the burden with you, for you have no other person that can
comfort you.
God has promised to take care of the fatherless, the orphans
and the singles but for the marriage, God has given you someone or handed you
over to someone. It was described as significant the day in which the pastor
(God’s representative) took your hand from your father and handed you over to
the man. Neither of you have any excuse not to comfort one another. God will
help us to be the source of comfort to our spouses.